It was the blurst of times...

I was talking to Beau the other day (That's right: he of the Tightly Buttoned Sleeves ) about how badly I wish I could start blogging again, but how whenever I tried, I always seemed to be in the midst of the general series of ridiculous occurrences that pretty much define my existence. Anytime I gave it a go, it felt like I was trying to explain an episode of an established television show to someone that had thoroughly enjoyed the first few episodes of season one.

To put that in context, imagine jumping from the Buffy pilot to the Season Four finale, without ANY of the backstory of what filled in the gaps. We're talking THAT level of incomprehension. Most of the characters look the same, but where we are, and how we got there? And why Willow is kissing girls now? That takes build up. But Beau convinced me to just ignore all of that. Pick something, and run with it. We can fill the back-story in as we go.

And at the moment, the thing REALLY occupying my mind a lot, is Borders. The bookshop that featured so heavily in my life over the last few years has gone into receivership. They're closing the doors, and soon, they'll just be a memory. So many good people that I'll always remember fondly have been made redundant, and for some inexplicable reason, even though I haven't worked there in over a year, it feels like a really personal loss. Which is dumb. I hated working there in the end. It was a nightmare. I used to sit in my car and just cry after a shift sometimes. It was THAT level of awful.

But the people? Some of the best people I've ever known, I only met because of that place. In a time in my life where everything was falling apart because of my breakup with Michael, these people provided stability, and acceptance, and became family. If it wasn't for Borders, Parkhill never would have become what it is today, and I shudder to think the person I would have become without the love and guidance of those amazing people.

Which is why it seems so strange to think, some time soon, the doors will close, the lights will go out, and the shelves that WE put up and filled with our bare hands will be disassembled and destroyed. Kind of devastating really. To make matters worse, souring what should have been a time of solidarity and togetherness, a rogue bitchy element in the place seem to have made it their mission to fuck heavily with Sarah, a crime I don't forgive lightly, and which led to me being UNinvited to the Borders Farewell. (How childish is THAT!) Which sucks. Because I'd love to drink to the stores memory with people that I haven't seen in so long, united in the knowledge that WE had something to do with the places success. But I can't go to an event like that and look the people that betrayed one of MY best friends in the eyes. I'm just not wired for that.

But whatever. The beauty of memories is that they last forever, and the beauty of that place is I made friendships that even now, years down the line, I know I'll carry with me for the rest of my life. Much like the way you never forget a REALLY good book. It's never far from your heart.

That's it, Glee. Suck my balls.

It's funny, the things that can drive me to start blogging again. Sometimes, something exciting will happen that I really want to share with the world. (By which I mean with the two people that still occasionally bother to check this place). Sometimes, I'll feel some sort of guilt at the fact I haven't updated in a while. And then, some days, I'll just be so monumentally pissed off about something that the only way I can adequately unleash the fury is by expressing myself in blog, so as to publicly (again, by which I mean to you two) acknowledge my indignation and rage. Guess what type of post you're getting today!

Let me preface this by acknowledging the fact that, in the past, I've used this very blog to sing the praises of Glee. Even this season, when almost everyone I know has stopped watching, and even I have to admit the show has been terrible, I've stuck in there. Because no matter how bad it was, I wanted it to get good again. I was like a battered wife, and Glee was my liquored up husband. I was prepared to keep telling people I was walking into the door, because every now and then, he'd come home sober and tell me how pretty I look. And that made me forget about all the bad things.

But then, Glee went and won a Golden Globe for Best Musical/ Comedy TV series. Which is all good and well, until you realise that it beat 30 Rock, Modern Family, AND The Big C. Are you fucking kidding me? Those three shows are three of the most well written, intelligent, HILARIOUS shows I've ever watched, and they were beaten by the inane adventures of a High School Glee Club? In what parallel world does that make sense, exactly? What episodes could the judges have POSSIBLY been watching that made this seem like a good decision? Was it the bad acting? The redundant songs? The lack of a continuing storyline? Honestly- as somebody that has made NO secret of my guilty obsession with Glee, even *I* can't think of a single reason for anybody claiming it's a better show than the other three! And I know everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but really? Is ANYBODY (apart from the Golden Globe judges) going to stand there and tell me that this seems to make any kind of sense?

I suppose I should be glad it happened. It made me angry enough to finally get sick of his shit. Glee, when you come home, expect to see my stuff gone, with a short note telling you I've moved out, and not to come looking for me this time. We're over. I can't take this abuse anymore. I'm sorry.