Friday, November 28, 2008

The Adventures of Bat-Bones and Beau-bin

Beau and I are total superheroes, and it deserves its own blog, so everyone knows just how freaking awesome we are. The other night, we totally laughed in the face of danger and saved the life of an innocent bystander, thus solidifying our radness, and buying about a million karmic points, to be cashed in on booze and hookers in the near future.

It was late at night, and Beau had just left my place (hereafter referred to as the Bones Cave), when he sensed danger and activated my Signal Alarm (knocked on my front door), so I leapt into action and followed him out onto the street to face whatever adversary the Dark City wanted to throw at us that night.

So, not entirely unlike Batman and Robin, we fell into formation, our first thoughts being to protect the civilians that accompanied us. Which, YES, to the untrained eye may have looked like we were making Corey and Kristen go first, but realistically, we just assessed the situation and knew that any attack was more likely to come FROM BEHIND, as they could be using the man in the gutter as a decoy, or as bait in some elaborate trap.

Fortuantely, there was no attack, and the man in the gutter was helped to safety, and possibly, more beer. And everyone made it home safely. Thanks, once again, to the efforts of two unsung heroes. Well, not entirely unsung, now. But still. We were pretty awesome.

An urgent letter

To save my soul from being completely destroyed by rge retail industry, I have decided to open the lines of communication with customers, to help cure them of their bad habits, and to make the general shopping experience somewhat more pleasant. Think of it as my way of giving something back to the community, because I'm nice like that.

Dear Customer,

Please do not take this the wrong way, but you are not as smart as you think you are. By a long shot. And unlike you, I have actually spent a good deal of time in the store, and have a fairly good understanding of how things work and where things are. When I see you, looking dumbfounded, typing some random string of words into the computer and wondering why you can't find whatever book it is you're looking for, I ask you if you need help, because quite frankly, you do. Don't look scathingly at me and tell me that you're fine, you're just looking something up on the computer, because I know exactly how this will end. I'll smile politely and go to walk away, and you, realising you don't know your ass from your elbow, will sheepishly admit to not knowing where something is, despite the computer telling you it is "In Store".
So from now on, lets not dance this dance every time. Lets just accept that I'm here to help, and that way, we can get out of one anothers lives so much faster.
Anyway, love and kisses,

Michael

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Shamefully overdue

It's harder maintaining one of these than I thought it would be, and I assume part of the reason for that is the fact that I keep a physical handwritten journal, so a lot of the updates that SHOULD be ending up here, end up there, and once I've done that, I can't be arsed transferring. Damn you, laziness.

So, a quick post for a few updates, and then I can hopefully slip seamlessly back into the habit of keeping a kickass blog, much to the delight of the internets.

The house settles on Friday, thus severing any lingering ties Michael and I have with one another, and hopefully signalling a complete ceasing of contact between us (Deep breaths- it's ALMOST over)

Finished reading Maos Last Dancer, and it was a lot less painful than I was expecting. I'm now reading "Seven Ancient Wonders". Thanks, Matt Reilly. This is...um... great. *Activate sarcasm chip*

Started dating a guy, Daylan, and it's all very exciting and new. More news probably forthcoming there...

Borders christmas party at a bowling club this Friday night. Drunken antics sure to ensue. Full story at 11...

I finally registered at www.noweekwillbewasted.com so I'll have a new internet hangout with the old CMX gang. Well, the cool ones, anyway :D

I'm racking my brain to think of anything else, but I can't right now...

Friday, November 21, 2008

Stupid comics

My awesome, comic related Sydney trip? Off. Thanks a lot, comic book delays. To say nothing for the fact I'm now working Sunday, but still. Very inconvenient. Especially with Buffy. It's getting annoying! Don't they realise how excited I am? Now all I have to look forward to is another issue of After the Fall. Well. Whoopdedoo.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Psychic Powers, ACTIVATE!

Woke up in a tizz this morning, after an awful dream where I had made Sarah cry. Lots. By being horrible to her. Naturally, felt dreadful, and couldn't wait for her to get to work so I could apologise, assuming she must hate me for something I've done that I can't remember.

So, when she gets there, I apologise as planned, only to discover that she WAS upset last night. Not at me, thankfully, but still. I think this points to latent psychic powers that I will now be devoting all my time to finding a way to exploit.

On an unrelated note, I bought Amelie today, after hearing how great it is for years. It better live up to the hype, or I'll be pissed at my wasted $4.20.

Bones is an idiot

Comment made by me today, helping a coworker decide to buy something with this weeks dicount or next weeks? "50 IS bigger than 40".

Yeah, thanks for that. Dickhead. *rolleyes*

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Comic Book Heaven

So, after tooling around on the internet, I discovered something awesome. November 19th is oficially the greatest day for comic books in 2008! Seriously, on the one day, we get the last installment of Batman: RIP, the last installment of the current Buffy Season 8 arc, AND a new issue of Kick-Ass! Holy nerdfest, Batman!

Batman #681: I am SERIOUSLY hoping to read this and have one of those "Oooooh!" moments were the last couple of issues suddenly make a heap of sense. Because really. Bat Mite? Batman of Zurr Enn Hurr? Thomas Wayne isn't dead? I did read an interesting theory today that supposed Robin was going to turn out to be the big bad of the arc, which seems nuts, until you realise HE WEARS BLACK GLOVES!!!! ZOMG! Coincidence? Probably. At this stage, there's as good a chance of the Black Glove being a Post-Op Aunt Harriet or something. Whatever. I may not have followed it 100%, but I can't wait to read the conclusion!

Buffy Season 8 #19: The conclusion to the Time of Your Life arc has been delayed a few times, but now that it actually looks like it's got a solid release date, I could just about pee with excitement. I was so excited when I first heard Joss was returning to the Frayverse, and this arc has turned Season 8 up to 11. I'm really curious to see how he resolves everything! How does Buffy get back? Does Frays future cease to exist? Whats up with Dark Willow? How does this affect Twilight? And were those mystery solicits referring to a major death accurate, or just bullshit? This series has been way better than a Media Tie-In comic has any right to be!
Kick-Ass #5: There is absolutely NOTHING I can say to fully describe how awesome this series is, and I've just read four issues so far! CANNOT WAIT for the fifth.


So, I think a trip to Kings will most certainly be in order that weekend. Because waiting is for chumps.