Wednesday, December 31, 2008

NYE Megamix

Because who DOESN'T want to know want Bones is listening to tonight? And if you don't want to know, fuck off. It's my blog. :p

So, I just created the greatest CD in the history of the universe for tonights shenanigans. Lets look.

1. Cool Rider- Michelle Pfeiffer
Oh yeah, baby! What better way to see in the new year than with this, possibly one of the greatest songs EVER WRITTEN? If you can think of a better way, I'd like to hear it. And besides, this song is a tribute to Sarah's and my friendship, so, you know, sentimental as well!

2. Your Disco Needs You- Kylie Minogue
My favourite Kylie song ever. No megamix is complete without it.

3. Hot N Cold- Katy Perry
Fun enough- earnt a spot by being a boppy number that gets my toes tapping.

4. On a Night Like This- Kylie Minogue
What kind of homo would I be if I didn't listen to THIS song on New Years Eve? A rubbish one. Or Beau. :p

5. Can't Shake It- Kate Miller-Heidke
I figure the people that hate my music will be just about ready to kill themselves by this stage, I decided a compromise was in order. KMH is one such compromise.

6. So Much Better- Legally Blonde: The Musical
Because FUCK YOU, that's why. And this song describes my emotional state for a good portion of this year.

7. So What- P!nk
Bitch can groove, and I dig that!

8. Excuse My French- Kylie Minogue
Well, not actually Kylie. I thought it was for ages though, and I like it.

9. When The Moneys Gone- Cher
Oh yeah, the gay doesn't stop with musicals and Kylie- we've got Holy St Cher on here as well! This is one of the most romantic songs I've ever heard, and it gets me dancing like you wouldn't believe!

10. Part of Your World- Little Mermaid (Dance Version)
Well, if we're having Disney Singstar at this party, it makes a certain amount of sense, wouldn't you agree?

11. In Your Eyes- Kylie Minogue
Do I even need to explain the Kylie ones anymore?

12. Common People- William Shatner
Another one to keep the less musically inclined audience happy...

13. Womanizer- Britney Spears
Its my CD, and I'll have Brit if I want to. And you've gotta admit, it's a cool song.

14. Like a Drug- Kylie Minogue
One of the more awesome songs performed at X (I wish ALL of my entrances involved riding a giant skull)

15. Strong Enough- Cher
One of the divas greatests, but another symbolic one based on my headspace in 08

16. Speakerphone- Kylie Minogue
Another concert related Kylie number.

17. Holding out for a Hero- Jennifer Saunders
Anyone that has ever heard this song will already know why it was chosen. Because it is pure, undiluted AWESOMESAUCE!

18. Love at First Sight- Kylie Minogue
Radness of her magnitude need not be explained.

19. Mamma Mia!- Abba
Well, it's a camp little thing... like me :p

20. If I Could Turn Back Time- Cher
Seemed like an appropriate New Years Eve song.

21. Better The Devil You Know- Kylie Minogue
Another sentimental one for Sarah, after her kickass karaoke performance (regular readers may remember the video!)

So there you have it- possibly the greatest mixed CD in the history of, well, today at least! Anyone want a copy? ;)

Time Travel

So it's New Years Eve, and, as I'm sure happens to all normal people, my thoughts have turned to time travel. Not crazy, sci-fi "Oh Shit- a caveman!" time travel, just the more sedate kind. You know, jumping forward a few years along your personal timeline to have a nosy around and see how things are going.
I used to think it would be awful, knowing exactly how things were going to turn out, with no ability to change anything, but now, I think it would be kinda rad.
What kickstarted all of this thinking was my own feeble attempt at contacting myself through the mists of time and writing myself a series of letters earlier in the year, to be opened at certain times, just as a bit of an experiment in seeing how it felt, receiving these messages that had been created in a completely different point in my life. It was interesting, to say the least, reading something from 8 months ago addressed to me, but all it really told me that, whilst well meaning, my past self was kinda naive, and caught up in his own shit.
And anyway, all this led me to think, the perfect way to see the future would be to access your facebook from five years in the future! How great would that be! You could look at your page, get almost a cliff notes overview on how things had progressed, and leave it at that! You could see where you worked, how you looked, who you were still friends with, wether you were in a relationship- all the good stuff, but without ruining everything for yourself.
It would be like, during season one of Buffy, someone saying to you, "Yeah, in the final episode, Buffy and Angel have a really nice moment, Xander has one eye, Willow and Kennedy are together and they manage to save the world."
Nothing is totally spoilt, and the things it told you wouldn't even make a great deal of sense, but it would still be kinda fun.

So, I think I'll make my New Years Resolution to travel in time. Happy New Years!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

All that hype...

So, now that Christmas is over for another year, I'm left with that feeling of having gotten ridiculously excited over nothing again! Not to say the day itself wasn't awesome- it really, really was, it's just that, you know, I was pimping my Christmas cheer for a month, and then, in 24 hours, BAM! It's done! Oh well, I wonder when I can start getting excited about next year?

The run down on what happened this year though? Christmas Eve night, I was ironically almost killed by a copy of Charles Dickens "A Christmas Carol" when I dropped it on my face whilst reading in bed.

Was woken at six by my hyperactive mother- the person that gets MOST excited about Christmas on the face of the planet. Attempted to get Yoshie to attack her so I could get some more sleep, but he failed...

Traded presents- was spoilt like you wouldn't believe. Thinking this was the families attempt at distracting me from the fact that it was the first Christmas without Michael (who I saw on Christmas Eve at Westfield. Whilst I was wearing a mothertrukking Elf hat. Goddammit) My mother outdid herself this year, gifts including a digital camera, Darling perfume, Fuel by Diesel, Pushing Daisies on DVD (Winning the ZOMG! prize) and a bunch of other stuff.

Saw Daylan and traded presents, giving me a "WONDER TWINS! ACTIVATE" oppurtunity that was completely lost on him, but fully appreciated by Simon when I retold it.

Finished the night with drinks at Damien and Adams house, where I managed to move beyond "no no, I'll only have a few" to my usual trashy, drunken idiot self in just under a bottle of wine. Not my proudest moment, but shouldn't all Boxing Days start with having to lick the inside of your mouth to check if you threw up, due to drunken amnesia?

So all in all, a fantastic christmas that managed to stay fabulous all the way until now! Thanks to everyone that played a part, and I hope everyone that reads this had as amazing a christmas as i did!

Friday, December 19, 2008

Full of fail

People who know me well know that one of my major pet peeves is people wearing Superhero shirts without having even the most basic understanding of who it is they're promoting. You know the ones I mean- the teenyboppers sporting Aquaman shirts, or Green Lantern symbols, or even in a few instances, the cheesy grin of Captain Marvel. I know it's a petty concern, but as someone that devotes an ungodly amount of time and energy into these characters and their stories and mythologies, it pisses me off.

Imagine how I must have felt then, today, when a girl came in to work wearing a shirt that said "Anything Boys can do, Girls can do Better!!!" with the smiling images of Wonder Woman, Batgirl (The Barbara Gordon version) and Supergirl (Pre crisis, of course). Now, the sentiment of the shirt isn't the problem. Actually, it's admirable enough, and I applaud it. But could it have picked worse characters to attempt to make its point?

We're comparing Barbara Gordon to Bruce Waynes Batman, are we? Really? Now, don't get me wrong- I love Babs. A lot. Batgirl: Year One was one of the most enjoyable comic stories I've ever read. I think she's one of the better female characters on the market. But better, or as good as Batman? Barbara Gordon? Remember this?


Batman RIP aside, Bruce is still fighting crime dressed as a bat, while Babs was shot and crippled by the Joker in The Killing Joke.

And Supergirl? I admit, I don't know a great deal about the Pre Crisis Supergirl, apart from the fact that she fell in love with a Super Horse at some stage (WTF, silver age. WTF?), but if we're saying she was as good, if not better than Superman, should we take a look at one of the most iconic comic book images of all time?
Killed in Crisis on Infinite Earths. I know Superman died as well one time, but at least he got better!

So, in my incredulity, I felt the need to point this out to said customer, by way of laughing and asking if she knew why her shirt was hilariously stupid. When she said no, I laughed and said "Well, WW is ok, but Batgirl was shot and crippled, and that Supergirl has been dead for 20 years. It's really not proving your point at all!"

She got all pissy and defensive, and her friend pointed out Batman had his back broken as well. So I rolled my eyes and said yeah, he did- further proving Batmans superiority- he cured himself of a broken back!

Now, it's possible this opens up a whole new can of worms about comic book misogyny and the treatment of female characters in the genre, and maybe there should be some sensible discussion about the comparison between male and female characters, i admit. Would probably be all sorts of interesting to read. But here is not the place. I just want to vent, because, hell, lady- your stupid shirt is full of fail.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

NPH is my hero.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die


Jack Black was born to play Jesus.

"The Bible says a lot of things". LOL

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Tingly feelings all over

I was talking to a lady today, about tarot decks, when she stops midsentence, looks at me, and says "I can read auras, you know, and you have a very nice aura." Which I've always suspected about myself, but anyway, she continued to rave about my attractive aura, until she asked me if I felt tingly. When I asked her what the heck she meant, she told me that she always feels tingly around other psychically gifted people, and was I the same?

To which I lied and said yes, because it made me sound cool. I hope my sexy aura didn't tell her I was lying...

Friday, November 28, 2008

The Adventures of Bat-Bones and Beau-bin

Beau and I are total superheroes, and it deserves its own blog, so everyone knows just how freaking awesome we are. The other night, we totally laughed in the face of danger and saved the life of an innocent bystander, thus solidifying our radness, and buying about a million karmic points, to be cashed in on booze and hookers in the near future.

It was late at night, and Beau had just left my place (hereafter referred to as the Bones Cave), when he sensed danger and activated my Signal Alarm (knocked on my front door), so I leapt into action and followed him out onto the street to face whatever adversary the Dark City wanted to throw at us that night.

So, not entirely unlike Batman and Robin, we fell into formation, our first thoughts being to protect the civilians that accompanied us. Which, YES, to the untrained eye may have looked like we were making Corey and Kristen go first, but realistically, we just assessed the situation and knew that any attack was more likely to come FROM BEHIND, as they could be using the man in the gutter as a decoy, or as bait in some elaborate trap.

Fortuantely, there was no attack, and the man in the gutter was helped to safety, and possibly, more beer. And everyone made it home safely. Thanks, once again, to the efforts of two unsung heroes. Well, not entirely unsung, now. But still. We were pretty awesome.

An urgent letter

To save my soul from being completely destroyed by rge retail industry, I have decided to open the lines of communication with customers, to help cure them of their bad habits, and to make the general shopping experience somewhat more pleasant. Think of it as my way of giving something back to the community, because I'm nice like that.

Dear Customer,

Please do not take this the wrong way, but you are not as smart as you think you are. By a long shot. And unlike you, I have actually spent a good deal of time in the store, and have a fairly good understanding of how things work and where things are. When I see you, looking dumbfounded, typing some random string of words into the computer and wondering why you can't find whatever book it is you're looking for, I ask you if you need help, because quite frankly, you do. Don't look scathingly at me and tell me that you're fine, you're just looking something up on the computer, because I know exactly how this will end. I'll smile politely and go to walk away, and you, realising you don't know your ass from your elbow, will sheepishly admit to not knowing where something is, despite the computer telling you it is "In Store".
So from now on, lets not dance this dance every time. Lets just accept that I'm here to help, and that way, we can get out of one anothers lives so much faster.
Anyway, love and kisses,

Michael

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Shamefully overdue

It's harder maintaining one of these than I thought it would be, and I assume part of the reason for that is the fact that I keep a physical handwritten journal, so a lot of the updates that SHOULD be ending up here, end up there, and once I've done that, I can't be arsed transferring. Damn you, laziness.

So, a quick post for a few updates, and then I can hopefully slip seamlessly back into the habit of keeping a kickass blog, much to the delight of the internets.

The house settles on Friday, thus severing any lingering ties Michael and I have with one another, and hopefully signalling a complete ceasing of contact between us (Deep breaths- it's ALMOST over)

Finished reading Maos Last Dancer, and it was a lot less painful than I was expecting. I'm now reading "Seven Ancient Wonders". Thanks, Matt Reilly. This is...um... great. *Activate sarcasm chip*

Started dating a guy, Daylan, and it's all very exciting and new. More news probably forthcoming there...

Borders christmas party at a bowling club this Friday night. Drunken antics sure to ensue. Full story at 11...

I finally registered at www.noweekwillbewasted.com so I'll have a new internet hangout with the old CMX gang. Well, the cool ones, anyway :D

I'm racking my brain to think of anything else, but I can't right now...

Friday, November 21, 2008

Stupid comics

My awesome, comic related Sydney trip? Off. Thanks a lot, comic book delays. To say nothing for the fact I'm now working Sunday, but still. Very inconvenient. Especially with Buffy. It's getting annoying! Don't they realise how excited I am? Now all I have to look forward to is another issue of After the Fall. Well. Whoopdedoo.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Psychic Powers, ACTIVATE!

Woke up in a tizz this morning, after an awful dream where I had made Sarah cry. Lots. By being horrible to her. Naturally, felt dreadful, and couldn't wait for her to get to work so I could apologise, assuming she must hate me for something I've done that I can't remember.

So, when she gets there, I apologise as planned, only to discover that she WAS upset last night. Not at me, thankfully, but still. I think this points to latent psychic powers that I will now be devoting all my time to finding a way to exploit.

On an unrelated note, I bought Amelie today, after hearing how great it is for years. It better live up to the hype, or I'll be pissed at my wasted $4.20.

Bones is an idiot

Comment made by me today, helping a coworker decide to buy something with this weeks dicount or next weeks? "50 IS bigger than 40".

Yeah, thanks for that. Dickhead. *rolleyes*

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Comic Book Heaven

So, after tooling around on the internet, I discovered something awesome. November 19th is oficially the greatest day for comic books in 2008! Seriously, on the one day, we get the last installment of Batman: RIP, the last installment of the current Buffy Season 8 arc, AND a new issue of Kick-Ass! Holy nerdfest, Batman!

Batman #681: I am SERIOUSLY hoping to read this and have one of those "Oooooh!" moments were the last couple of issues suddenly make a heap of sense. Because really. Bat Mite? Batman of Zurr Enn Hurr? Thomas Wayne isn't dead? I did read an interesting theory today that supposed Robin was going to turn out to be the big bad of the arc, which seems nuts, until you realise HE WEARS BLACK GLOVES!!!! ZOMG! Coincidence? Probably. At this stage, there's as good a chance of the Black Glove being a Post-Op Aunt Harriet or something. Whatever. I may not have followed it 100%, but I can't wait to read the conclusion!

Buffy Season 8 #19: The conclusion to the Time of Your Life arc has been delayed a few times, but now that it actually looks like it's got a solid release date, I could just about pee with excitement. I was so excited when I first heard Joss was returning to the Frayverse, and this arc has turned Season 8 up to 11. I'm really curious to see how he resolves everything! How does Buffy get back? Does Frays future cease to exist? Whats up with Dark Willow? How does this affect Twilight? And were those mystery solicits referring to a major death accurate, or just bullshit? This series has been way better than a Media Tie-In comic has any right to be!
Kick-Ass #5: There is absolutely NOTHING I can say to fully describe how awesome this series is, and I've just read four issues so far! CANNOT WAIT for the fifth.


So, I think a trip to Kings will most certainly be in order that weekend. Because waiting is for chumps.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Trick or Treat.

Happy Halloween, y'all. So Beau and I were planning on carving all of these totally awesome pumpkins, and being all Halloweeny, and giving lollies to costumed kiddies, and wearing cool getups and generally getting into the spirit of the day. Yeah, that totally didn't happen. Stupid Australia, with its stupid lack of carvable pumpkins. I didn't even realise pumpkins HAD varieties, until I started looking for orange ones. Apparantly, they're some mythical breed of ultra rare Mega-Pumpkin or something, and Australians just can't be trusted with them. That's obviously the only logical explanation, because we scoured Newcastle (if by "scoured" you mean went to one fruit shop and several Woolworths, then yeah, we scoured) with absolutely NO success. So we gave up.

And the lollies that were purchased for all the charming children? Spent the night gorging on, as well as pizza, and coffee, and triple chocolate mousse with cream. Kinda think I'm going to die now.

Here's a carved pumpkin I found on the internet for your enjoyment, seeing as I don't have one of my own to show off. :(

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Mission Accomplished

10 Posts before the end of October? Easy :D

Is this cheating?

So, as mentioned earlier, I'm reading through the Top 100 Novels list, and I've hit a conundrum. I have absolutely no desire whatsoever to read Mao's Last Dancer. So, would it be considered cheating if I just read the Young Readers Edition?? I'm not sure wether that crosses the line into some sort of literary fraud, and wether it's just a small step away from wikipedia browsing a books plot and claiming to have read it.

Ultimately, I know I'm the only one that really cares about it, but still, I'm torn. I'm also half tempted to say "Fuck It" and just read comic books instead. Decisions, decisions...

Commitment? What's that??

So, in preparation for the upcoming Kylie concert, I joined the gym a few weeks ago, because, as we all know, one has to look ones best for a social engagement of such significance. Yeah, I think I've been maybe three times since signing up. Apparently, it's not enough to just pay for a membership, you're actually expected to UTILISE the damn thing. So I was all excited to go after work today, but now I'm home, after an 8 hour day, and I know I'll be going jogging with Beau later tonight, and possibly heading out to the Cambridge after that (On a School night! WTF?!?) AND I have to work tomorrow. Sigh. Somethings gotta give, and it will probably be the gym. Again. Because I'm lame.

Mind you, come the concert, I'll be bitching like you wouldn't believe when I've got the least impressive body in Acer Arena, and when that happens, I expect sympathy from all of you. First one to point out it's my own fault will be forced to watch Cher DVDs with me. For all eternity. While I sing along.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Excitement Plus

Want to know what I'm ridiculously excited for?? I'll give you a hint- it starts with K and rhymes with Riley X.
Oh yeah, baby! Kylie X! Bring on December 14! Jealous?? You should be- it's going to KICK ASS!

Parkhillian Awesomeness

So, a few weeks ago, I went out with some completely awesome friends, and we had a fantastic night, involving ping pong, terrible stand up comedy, Big Game Hunting, a literal BOWL of coffee, a homophobic homo, and eventually, Kylie Minogue karaoke. It was great. Even if I was refused entry into a pub for being too drunk before the drinking had even started!!!! Newsflash, people- Sober Men Skip Too!

I promised to upload this video ages ago, but, you know, being lazy, I've just got round to it. This is Sarah and Leesh's stunning Gateway debut. I <3 these guys.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Epic Fail, A&R

I'm a sucker for lists, and being a "book person", Angus & Robertsons Top 100 would, presumably, be right up my alley. Last year, I made it my goal to read each and every book on there, thus opening myself up to a wonderful new world of literary treasures I would have otherwise never discovered, or continued putting on my "To read" pile (which is getting ridiculously large as it is) and never actually getting around to. So, I'm still plowing my way through the 2007 list, when I notice the other day, they've released the new one. And I'm not real happy about it.

Firstly, in the number one spot? The Harry Potter SERIES. That's right. Put aside the fact that Australia has decided the Harry Potter series is the greatest piece of literature on the face of the planet for a second. That's seven books!! How can that be Number One???? Which is bad enough, but then, in position four? The Obernewtyn Chronicles! That's another five books! So already, this "Top 100" has become a "Top 110". And making it even more annoying, Eragon and Eldest are listed seperately, in positions 52 & 66, which means the list doesn't even follow its own logic!

Another one of my MAJOR issues with the list? The Australian public are clearly idiots. The Secret (22), Pillars of the Earth (34), A New Earth (39), World Without End (69) and The Last Lecture (79)? All featured on Oprah. I'm not sure why this annoys me so much, but it does. It may just be residual anger from the Oprah-philes that swarm work like Zombies whenever Queen Whinfrey tells them they HAVE to read this latest book that moved her to tears. Mob mentality is bringing down the integrity of the list.

And, finally, the Author Bias. Jodi Piccoult, Matthew Reilley and Bryce Courtenay seem to make up about a third of the fucking books on there! And really, can people HONESTLY say that Matt Reilly deserves a spot on the greatest novels of all time? Ice Station is fun, but really? Come on.

It's not all negativity though. I did like that Pride and Prejudice and To Kill a Mockingbird were both still in the Top 10. And it made me happy to see The Book Thief at number 7. I liked seeing The Princess Bride and American Gods both earnt a mention, and it HAS inspired me to finally read Fight Club, so I guess all is not lost!

And it isn't just the fact that I work for the competition, either. Angus & Robertson just put out a shit list this year.

I blame Cher



So, I totally managed to turn back time today, and like any self respecting gay man, I blame Cher.

I spent my day discovering the awesomeness of Marvel: Ultimate Alliance on the Wii (and trust me, it's becoming harder and harder to find cool games to brag about on that thing). Which doesn't sound too bad, until you realise it came out in 2006. Yeah, that's right, Bones. Way to be cutting edge *roll eyes*

I don't care that I am normally a DC Man. Fucking shit up as Captain America is just plain fun.

PS- While wikipedia-ing "2006 in Music" to make some witty pop culture reference from two years ago, I discovered that the A*Teens (bunch of Swedish kids that made a "career" out of butchering Abba hits) disbanded in April that year. Their reason? "Well for starters we figured that it’s better to stop when you’re still on top."






Oh yes. They thought they were once"on top". Feel free to be amused.

Monday, October 20, 2008

An enormous step.

I saw my ex today, for the first time in months. Really, the first time since the break up, where we stopped talking. Well, not actually the break up, but the first time since we decided to stop sleeping with one another POST breakup. And it was awkward. But not as awkward as I expected it to be. And as awkward as it was, it felt as though it wouldn't be that way forever.

I saw him because I decided to let him see Yoshie, the dog we had together that we agreed I should take in the divorce. Since we broke up, Michael never expressed any interest in seeing Yosh, until a few weeks back, when out of the blue, he sms'd me about it. At first, I agreed, but on my terms, being I would take Yosh to the park, and he was welcome to come and spend time with him there. He got all pissy, and didn't think that was fair, so I basically told him if he didn't like those terms, he could fuck off. I still stand by the fact that there was nothing wrong with that arrangement, but eventually, I recognised that I was refusing to budge out of stubborness, so I asked if he wanted to have him overnight, which he jumped at the chance to do.

Seeing him tonight made me realise how much I miss my old life, but not in the sense I regret where I am now, because I don't. Only in the nostalgic sense, because we were all so happy. It's a shame life took the shape it did. It's not that I have feelings for him anymore (honestly, the guy was a fucking DICK during the breakup. He told me over facebook chat that he had a new boyfriend. Despite having led me along for weeks with the prospect of reconciliation) but tonight was the first time I entertained the thought that we could actually remain a part of one anothers lives in the future. Which would be kinda nice. I mean, he did know me better than anyone else on the planet for over six years. That kind of thing doesn't just dissapear.

None of this was my intention in letting the dog stay with him, by the way. That whole thing, suprisingly, was completely without alterior motive. For a change, I was being nice for no reason other than the act of being nice. As far as new trends go, I don't see it catching on.

NWWBW 08

NWWBW08. OR, the best thing I've heard of on the internets in a long time. It stands for No Week Will Be Wasted 2008. As in, you accomplish one awesome creative thing every week. Being half-assed, I adopted my own, less energetic version of this awesome scheme, and challenged myself to the relatively easy task of beginning this blog, and to make sure I stuck to it, I told myself I could aim for a paltry 10 posts before the end of October.

That was a week and a half ago. Now, it's the 20th, and I'm only three posts in. I think, at this rate, I'm failing. Which is dissapointing, but at least it has inspired me to pull my finger out and try harder!

So, bring on another 7 posts before the end of the month! Woo!

Quality is no issue!

Musings of a Retail Queen

"Excuse me? I know this is a stupid question, but..."

You know what? Stop right there. Honestly, customers everwhere seriously need to learn this lesson. Because really, when you walk in the door, I don't hate you. In fact, I kind of like you. But when you come up to me and utter THAT phrase, KNOWING it's going to make you sound like an idiot? Gah! I just don't understand! I wish I could interrupt the sentence with a quick "STOP! Stop right there. Don't say it. Don't ask it. Let's just go our seperate ways, believing that the other person is a decent human being."

You know, maybe there's some truth to the rumour that customer service isn't for me...

Friday, October 10, 2008

I'm not one to gossip, but...

"Well, you know what they say: if you don't have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!"

I was going to spend this post justifying my blogs reason for existence, but at the end of the day, everyone else has one, why the frak shouldn't I? And who doesn't need a place to take out all their frustration and anger towards the world? Especially an angry old thing like me?

And I realise, the majority of this will probably just be me, bitching about customers at work, but you know what- laughing at the stupidity of others can be its own reward.