Fight of the Century

There isn't much gossip being gossipped around this place, which is a blatant violation of the blogs ENTIRE reason for being, so, given the lack of amusing stories about other people for us to all band together and snicker about, I felt the time was right for me to share some of the more humiliating stories about me. For ALL our amusement.

And this one is pretty much Queen of the Stupid Story.

I was at Westfield one day, grabbing a coffee from McDonalds, when I spotted in the distance a girl. You know when you can tell someone is staring at you? Had that feeling, BIG TIME. I was still too far away to make her out, but I could see her there, and she was staring at me pretty intensely. Now, I love being the centre of attention, but I HATE being stared at. A contradiction, I know, but I'm full of them.

As I got closer to her, armed only with a shitty coffee, I noticed she was grinning like a maniac. I was attempting to avoid a confrontation at first, so I wasn't making DIRECT eye contact, but I kept glancing, and it was clear she was staring, grinning, and pissing me off.

This went on for a bit as I got closer and closer, and I realised I'd have to walk right past her to get back to work. By this stage, i was so worked up and enraged, I was prepared to unleash the absolute fury on this halfwit bitch-mole from hell.

Until I got closer and realised it was a cardboard cutout of Hanna Montanna. Yes, I was ready to punch out Miley Cyrus. Which would TOTALLY be the fight of the century. You know you'd pay to see it. And I'd totally kick her achy breaky ass.