What Would Mario Do?

I was playing Super Mario Galaxy this afternoon, and it got me thinking. What IS the go between Bowser and Peach? Because something is definitely afoot, and I want to know what it is. He kidnaps her with alarming regularity, and I'm starting to smell the bullshit.
Firstly: Why is he kidnapping her? Has it ever been established? Is it for sex? Is it for money? I don't understand what he's getting out of this arrangement. Does he have a thing for Mario and this is the only way to keep him coming round?
Secondly: How is he kidnapping her? She's not exactly being resistant to the whole process, is she? And I've SEEN her kick ass. She's done it lots of times! She's a regular Xena in Smash Bros Brawl, smacking bitches upside the head like a crazy person with her umbrella. So what's the dillio?
I think kidnapping her is a little TOO easy, if you're picking up what I'm putting down here... Has Nintendo been hiding a sick, disturbing mixed race relationship under our noses for years?
What would Mario say??